Mistrust

This was the first poem I ever wrote, and despite having taken me years to be confident enough to publish it, this was the exercise that made me fall in love with writing. I had taken classes on writing and structuring poetry during elementary and middle school, but I always found the exercise rather tedious and wasteful. But when my junior year English teacher asked us to write a poem based on a character from Pilgrim's Progress, I decided I might as well give it my best shot. 

The literary character Mistrust is never really fleshed out in the book. He's mentioned once as a fearful traveler who, like Christian, is on the path to the eternal city. However, when he encounters the lions on the path, he is unable to trust The Porter's words and tries to discourage Christian from proceeding.

This poem imagines a backstory for the character, trying to understand why he is unable to trust the promises of the Porter at that moment. Perhaps he has become jaded and afraid through painful experiences of broken promises, lies, and heartbreaks. Possibly, his shattered faith in humanity has clouded his eyes and prevented him from trusting the One who can never fail in His Word. Whatever the original reason, harboring this mistrust causes him to lose out on the opportunity to find salvation, leading him to also discourage others along the way.

As I finished writing this piece, I realized that I, too, was suffering from the same issue that the Mistrust had. I had experienced broken promises and was running away, avoiding connecting with or trusting anyone. But that distrust in humanity also led me to mistrust God and hindered my relationship with Him. So, if I don't want to go on like Mistrust and wish to avoid his fate, I must replace my self-reliance with trust in God, believing by faith that He will never let me down, come what may.